I love the fact that my life is surrounded by wonderful relationships. My parents have been married for what seems like and eternity and my brother and his wife have been together for most of my life (he is nine years older than me). They actually like one another. Here we are in the United States of America with a divorce rate of fifty percent or higher and they actually like hanging out with one another, what a freaking shock! I am aiming to beat those odds and join the club of fidelity and longevity along with my parents and my brother.
Since moving to Kansas, I've been bombarded with these questions: Are you married? Are you getting married? Are you engaged? Why aren't you married by now? Do you have children? (My personal favorite) Do you own a house?
Well, here are my answers for the MILLIONTH time...NO. YES. NO. BECAUSE I WOULD PREFER NOT TO BE IN DEBT UP TO MY EYEBALLS AS A NEWLYWED COUPLE. DO I LOOK LIKE I HAVE KIDS? NOT YET.
The question about children always gives me a little laugh. First of all, I would like to be married to my baby's daddy. I'm not going to be the one causing all the "baby mama drama" should it come to that (it won't). Second, I love children, but in a lot of ways, I am still a child myself. I really like being able to have as many beers as I want, when I want. I also love waking up mostly on my schedule. There are some days I have to go to the office earlier that my double digit rule (I don't wake up before double digits on the clock). One day we will have children.
I've also noticed here in Kansas, not being married is a fate worse than death. I guess since I didn't get married at fourteen or twelve or whatever, it is a HUGE deal. The only thing that is of larger concern for my fellow Kansans is the fact that Josh and I live together. Seriously, WTF! We are in a more committed relationship than that of some married people we know, I will not name names, but you know who you are, I really believe that's what matters. Yes, I would love to get married tomorrow. but the practicality of it all kicks in. I want a house first! When friends and family come to visit, they will have ample room to hang out...without us being on top of one another. When you own a house, it is the perfect arena for beer pong and dart tournaments. Can't play beer pong pregnant!
I guess I am use to living in bigger cities where the moral order is waining. No one minds your business unless you are family, friends or neighbors. Now, I have what feels like the whole state minding mine. I've barely become adjusted to the Kansas way of life, so GIVE ME A FREAKING BREAK, I really like it here. I don't want to summon the likes of Dorothy V. Graves and pull out a can of whoop ass on people yet.
So, my fellow Kansans, I promise to let you know when we are getting married. I will put it on a billboard if you'd like. Right now, we are happy, so be happy for us!
Disclaimer: For unwed mothers, do your thing. I think the responsibility you take on is major. I am just saying I could not do it by myself.
Monday, June 28, 2010
Round 2...Vegas
The lights illuminate the sky like a 120 watt light bulb in the darkest of closets. Your head spins with amazement like you are on a carousel going 87 mph. There is always so much to drink and so little time. This is my wonderland called Las Vegas.
This time, the wonderland was a little more tame than the last time. My number one PIC (Partner In Crime), Amanda was not with us (note to self: Amanda must accompany me on all Vegas excursions). I realized you can take the girl out of the party, but you can't take the party out of the girl.
Josh and I went to celebrate my birthday and we had a blast. My "blast" and his "blast" aren't even in the same solar system. He wanted to relax by the pool. I wanted to relax my the pool with tequila shots and fruity cocktail chasers until I "fell asleep." Josh wanted to see different hotels and casinos; he wanted to compare the architecture and amenities. The only amenities I wanted to compare were how fast can you get me my drink and which hotel had the best 3 foot margarita in a commemorative glass. Josh wanted to have a nice dinner and go back to the room and relax (this is where my vampire tendencies arise). I wanted to eat a little bit so, one, my stomach wouldn't be full-more room for beer and shots; second, I didn't want to puke while I drank and danced until the sun came up. Josh wanted to wake up early and have breakfast. I thought that was a brilliant idea, if breakfast were a bloody mary!!!!!!!
I drank and laughed while he studied what we can do next time to make things more "relaxing" (massage-no happy endings, facials, mani/pedi etc). I enticed him with strippers and booze while he returned the favor and enticed me with safety. All in all, we had a nice relaxing weekend...in Vegas. It was great to get away from the daily grind. I truly loved being in another world.
So, to my friend who was passed out on the beach in front of the Mirage, try to make it up to your room next time. To the girl doing the "walk of shame" with her face looking like a melted Barbie head, wash your face next time, it will make a world of difference. Finally, for all those parents who brought their cute, huggable toddlers, PLEASE put them to bed before 3 a.m. The wasted meltdown and toddler meltdown don't mesh well!
The party will return!
This time, the wonderland was a little more tame than the last time. My number one PIC (Partner In Crime), Amanda was not with us (note to self: Amanda must accompany me on all Vegas excursions). I realized you can take the girl out of the party, but you can't take the party out of the girl.
Josh and I went to celebrate my birthday and we had a blast. My "blast" and his "blast" aren't even in the same solar system. He wanted to relax by the pool. I wanted to relax my the pool with tequila shots and fruity cocktail chasers until I "fell asleep." Josh wanted to see different hotels and casinos; he wanted to compare the architecture and amenities. The only amenities I wanted to compare were how fast can you get me my drink and which hotel had the best 3 foot margarita in a commemorative glass. Josh wanted to have a nice dinner and go back to the room and relax (this is where my vampire tendencies arise). I wanted to eat a little bit so, one, my stomach wouldn't be full-more room for beer and shots; second, I didn't want to puke while I drank and danced until the sun came up. Josh wanted to wake up early and have breakfast. I thought that was a brilliant idea, if breakfast were a bloody mary!!!!!!!
I drank and laughed while he studied what we can do next time to make things more "relaxing" (massage-no happy endings, facials, mani/pedi etc). I enticed him with strippers and booze while he returned the favor and enticed me with safety. All in all, we had a nice relaxing weekend...in Vegas. It was great to get away from the daily grind. I truly loved being in another world.
So, to my friend who was passed out on the beach in front of the Mirage, try to make it up to your room next time. To the girl doing the "walk of shame" with her face looking like a melted Barbie head, wash your face next time, it will make a world of difference. Finally, for all those parents who brought their cute, huggable toddlers, PLEASE put them to bed before 3 a.m. The wasted meltdown and toddler meltdown don't mesh well!
The party will return!
If the Light Hangs Down...
I'm at home during the day and have created a little routine for myself. First, wake up, lay in bed and wach t.v. When I begin to toss and turn, it is time to move to the couch (the HDTV is way better). Second, I turn on the t.v. and watch ER (the news makes me sad and angry). Usually by the first commercial I've created a list of things to do like dry cleaning, groceries, or any of the other stuff that might need to get done fir the day so the funcionality of our lives is not disrupted. When I am finished with my errands, I take a short nap and then get ready for work, unless it is my day off. On the days, or should I say nights, I have free I usually begin laundry as soon as I wake. Laundry is an all day affair.
Last week, I began the laundry routine and finished two loads. As I was ready to move onto the third load (you know the segment where you are loading the washer and unloading the dryer) I noticed the light to the dryer was hanging down by the wires. I thought it was odd, so I removed the rest of the laundry from the dryer, stuck my head in and tried to put the light back in its place. Well, I apparently did it wrong because it sparked and then blew up. By time the light and wires exploded, my head was out of the dryer, my hand was the only thing close to the dryer bomb light, and I was thinking I should have worn some Depends. We called the repair man because the dryer is still under warranty. He proceeded to tell me I shorted out the entire dryer. He had to order the part and hopefully it will be fixed tomorrow.
So, I have learned, if the light hangs down on your dryer DON'T TRY TO FIX IT! Call the repair man because your dryer might explode and you might face a different fate than me. My ninja moves saved my life. Thank you oh wise one who has given me these skills. I live to see another day. Hopefully the light in the fridge won't ever hang down.
Last week, I began the laundry routine and finished two loads. As I was ready to move onto the third load (you know the segment where you are loading the washer and unloading the dryer) I noticed the light to the dryer was hanging down by the wires. I thought it was odd, so I removed the rest of the laundry from the dryer, stuck my head in and tried to put the light back in its place. Well, I apparently did it wrong because it sparked and then blew up. By time the light and wires exploded, my head was out of the dryer, my hand was the only thing close to the dryer bomb light, and I was thinking I should have worn some Depends. We called the repair man because the dryer is still under warranty. He proceeded to tell me I shorted out the entire dryer. He had to order the part and hopefully it will be fixed tomorrow.
So, I have learned, if the light hangs down on your dryer DON'T TRY TO FIX IT! Call the repair man because your dryer might explode and you might face a different fate than me. My ninja moves saved my life. Thank you oh wise one who has given me these skills. I live to see another day. Hopefully the light in the fridge won't ever hang down.
Sunday, June 27, 2010
Wichita
Let me begin by saying I like Wichita! I never thought I could live in a place without the ocean near, but here we are and I like it. If anyone asked me a year ago what I thought of Kansas, I'd have said, "It is in the middle of nowhere and there aren't beaches. Why would anyone want to live there?" I am eating those words and they actually taste really good! It is like being a steak lover and having lamb for the first time; things are really different, but they are savory and interesting creating a longing for more. When you've finished the last bite, its sad because you could easily eat another rack, but its also an accomplishment because you have tried something new and completely stepped outside your comfort zone. It is nice
I don't know about you, but I like fresh air. I kind of became accustomed to it living in Florida; and then things changed. It is amazing what you appreciate when it has been taken away. I realized I like breathing. I know, I know, who would like something like that when you have a Coach Store every five-hundred feet and every third car you see is a Mercedes. What was I thinking? I could give up fresh air for that, right? LA has everything, except clean beaches and fresh air. I thought those were two things I could give up. I've come to realize that the one thing I can't live without is fresh air. Thank you HBC for giving Josh a job! Thank you Wichita for not being pretentious and dirty. I am able to breathe easy.
I've learned we are in the middle of the country. It takes about two hours on a plane to get anywhere. When I need my fix for sticky salt air, I'm not far. When I want to feel the sand sift through my toes, I will fly home. Hypodermic needles were not the biggest incentive to walk on the beaches in LA. When Vegas is calling my name like a mother calling a child in for dinner, I'm not far. I have come to like Wichita and I haven't seen it all yet. Everyday is a new beginning to embrace. Come visit, you will see.
I don't know about you, but I like fresh air. I kind of became accustomed to it living in Florida; and then things changed. It is amazing what you appreciate when it has been taken away. I realized I like breathing. I know, I know, who would like something like that when you have a Coach Store every five-hundred feet and every third car you see is a Mercedes. What was I thinking? I could give up fresh air for that, right? LA has everything, except clean beaches and fresh air. I thought those were two things I could give up. I've come to realize that the one thing I can't live without is fresh air. Thank you HBC for giving Josh a job! Thank you Wichita for not being pretentious and dirty. I am able to breathe easy.
I've learned we are in the middle of the country. It takes about two hours on a plane to get anywhere. When I need my fix for sticky salt air, I'm not far. When I want to feel the sand sift through my toes, I will fly home. Hypodermic needles were not the biggest incentive to walk on the beaches in LA. When Vegas is calling my name like a mother calling a child in for dinner, I'm not far. I have come to like Wichita and I haven't seen it all yet. Everyday is a new beginning to embrace. Come visit, you will see.
Love of my Life
I've found my new addiction. My love for traveling has become intensified. Growing up, my Grandmother went to Las Vegas and Atlantic City a few times, always returning with casino cards, shirts, and anything else that would fit into her suitcase. I didn't understand it until now.
We always hear about Vegas being Sin City; if that's the case, let me wallow in the lights of my new found love. Let me indulge in this adult paradise until it kills me! The excitement makes you forget about the outside world. The beautiful people and casinos call your name to punish you in ways you only dream about!
Josh and Las Vegas are neck and neck for my affection!
To Las Vegas, I hope we grow old together. The days in between my next visit will be full on longing for 32 ounce beers at 9 a.m. The yard of margaritas will always have a place in my heart. I promise to do better next time and not pass out by 6 p.m. I promise to devote more time to you and all that you are. Until we meet again...
We always hear about Vegas being Sin City; if that's the case, let me wallow in the lights of my new found love. Let me indulge in this adult paradise until it kills me! The excitement makes you forget about the outside world. The beautiful people and casinos call your name to punish you in ways you only dream about!
Josh and Las Vegas are neck and neck for my affection!
To Las Vegas, I hope we grow old together. The days in between my next visit will be full on longing for 32 ounce beers at 9 a.m. The yard of margaritas will always have a place in my heart. I promise to do better next time and not pass out by 6 p.m. I promise to devote more time to you and all that you are. Until we meet again...
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